Whether you are in work or returning to work, mid-career can feel challenging –maybe featuring multiple responsibilities, shifting priorities or a growing sense of ‘what next?’ or ‘what now?’.
In coaching conversations over the last 18 months or so, I’ve been noticing a few recurring themes.
- Finding (and keeping) focus
- Creating space to think
- Looking after yourself
Over 3 posts, I’ll share some reflections, tools and books I’ve found useful. But first…
Mid-career?
I’ve deliberately not put an age bracket on ‘mid-career’! Interestingly, in conversations over the last few months, the age range of women identifying as mid-career has been larger than I’d anticipated. More than an age range, it’s the questions and challenges that are the consistent feature. Often I hear a sense of being at a point of being able to see both quite a long way back, and quite a long way forward in time; of standing at a cross-roads or balancing on a pivot point.
Maybe you’ve done a lot in your career so far and you are questioning how to put your strengths and skills into something (more) meaningful. Maybe you are returning to working after a period focused on family and you are wondering who you are in the workplace (again). Maybe you are managing or leading more people that you have before, or for the first time, and you want to do that authentically. I also hear a desire to rediscover and reconnect with strengths and values which may have been put on the back burner (or pushed down) because of circumstance.
Finding (and keeping) focus
If you are reading this and thinking “I don’t know where to start!”… well, I don’t think that is uncommon! Coaching is about having quality time to think, which can help you work out where the starting point is for you. There are some practical tools that can help you cut through the noise of competing priorities to find what it is you want to focus on. Here’s a couple of visual ones I like.
Tools
The Wheel of Life tool is a common tool and a good place to start to give yourself an overview.
Using it to reflect on your level of satisfaction with different areas of your life, it can be useful for when you need to identify the one or two areas of your life where making a change would be most beneficial to you.
It’s also useful to see the areas of your life where you feel a high level of satisfaction, reminding you to remember where things are going well too!
Here is a free tool: https://www.mindfulcoachingtools.com/free-tools/p/the-wheel-of-life
Another tool I really like is Constellation Mapping, which is good for exploring situations or challenges.
First, using objects to hand, we identify and place the elements (e.g. individuals, groups, organisations, services etc) involved. For example, this image represents a meeting (the kiwi coaster is the table) and the other objects are the people, teams and tasks involved and how they inter-relate.
Then, using questions, start to explore the relationships and dynamics between them, the emotions that come up, where your focus is and if that is where you want it to be. I like this tool because it helps you see the relationships and the dynamics both conscious and below the surface.
- Who and what is involved?
- How do the elements interact?
- What emotions are present?
- How do you feel?
- What if you move X? What if X grows / shrinks?
- Step back. What are you noticing?
- How would you like this constellation to look ideally?
Focus as energy
Using either or both of these tools can help with thinking where to focus your energy. It’s finite after all (even if we’d prefer to believe it isn’t)!
I really loved this book: The Well-Lived Life, by Dr. Glady McGarey.
Gladys was 102 when she wrote this book and her wise and encouraging words have stayed with me. One thing in particular that I’ve come back to often is her take on ‘boundaries’, and how those relate to the energy we expend.
She invites the reader to consider boundaries not as walls (which take energy to maintain) but as choices about where to direct your precious energy.
Coaching during mid-career
I coach women who want to feel the joy (again!) in their work. Maybe…
- You are looking for support to meet a particular challenge in your current role.
- You have fallen out of love with what you do and want to find your spark again, or you are considering a change and exploring new possibilities.
- You are leading a team and looking for support to co-create a positive and empowering team culture.
If you’d like a chat to explore how coaching might resource you, get in touch.
Book time with me: https://calendly.com/laura-jarque-cockram/30min
Email: hello@laura-cockram.co.uk
This post is based on a presentation for Flexible Working Scotland. Thank you to FWS for the opportunity to share as part of their webinar series https://events.humanitix.com/host/flexibleworkingscotland
